I Have Outlived My Metastatic Breast Cancer Diagnosis

As advised to Erica Rimlinger

Six months into my first being pregnant, I felt a lump in my breast and introduced it up at my physician’s appointment. “Oh, that’s regular,” my OB-GYN mentioned. “That occurs whenever you’re pregnant.”

Three years later, in 2022, I sat in a hospital robe taking a look at a PET scan of my physique. Every patch of sunshine on the black background confirmed the place cancer had taken residence. The scan was lit up just like the Las Vegas strip at evening.

That lump was not “regular.” It was HER2-positive breast cancer, and by the point it was found three years later, it had unfold in every single place.

As stunning as that picture was, I’d recognized one thing wasn’t proper in my physique after my daughter was born, and for 3 years afterward. My hair had turned three shades darker and was falling out and breaking. I slept 12 hours an evening and took two-hour naps to get by the day. I noticed specialists who recognized me with hypothyroidism. In the summertime of 2022, I discovered dimpling in my breast, like I had a damaged implant — besides I didn’t have implants. Once more, a dermatologist advised me it was “regular.”

Within the fall of 2022, the muscle tissues in my chest felt sore, and once I was showering, I felt a lump. This time, my physician advised me to get a mammogram and ultrasound, which led to a biopsy and analysis. I used to be in my early 30s, mother to a toddler, had all the time labored out, and had no household historical past of most cancers. How might I’ve breast cancer? I didn’t match the standards.

However the PET scan, glowing brightly, confirmed breast most cancers that had unfold to my lymph nodes, thyroid, kidneys, liver, abdomen, skeletal system and extra.

I instantly began chemotherapy and hormone suppressants. My insurance coverage wouldn’t cowl a mind MRI, though I had most cancers in every single place from the neck down and HER2-positive breast most cancers generally heads to the mind when it spreads. My physician fought for the mind MRI and, in February 2023, it got here again clear.

Extra excellent news adopted: In April 2023, I completed chemotherapy and my tumors had shrunk significantly. My liver enzymes have been regular. I stayed on hormone therapy, and my hair grew again. I had common scans to verify I used to be nonetheless shifting towards my objective of NED, “no proof of illness.” My physician despatched me for a second mind MRI in August.

I used to be sitting on the sofa with my daughter on the brink of take her to high school once I acquired the decision concerning the mind MRI outcomes.

It was the worst-case state of affairs: There was most cancers in my spinal wire fluid. When most cancers metastasizes there, it’s referred to as leptomeningeal illness, and it’s incurable. Once I rushed in to see my physician, and three extra medical doctors, that morning, I used to be advised I’d stay two weeks with out remedy and 4 months with remedy.

I had 10 rounds of radiation on my entire mind and entire backbone. I realized there was a medical group in Baltimore utilizing proton radiation. My insurance coverage denied this remedy, however I fought and received.

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In Baltimore, I stayed at a house for younger adults preventing most cancers. I missed my daughter and husband again in Tampa, nevertheless it was good to have a automotive service to the hospital and the companionship of a survivor neighborhood with individuals my age.

The remedy itself, nevertheless, wasn’t good. I vomited all the way in which house afterward and all through the entire evening, though I’d been given anti-nausea treatment. The second spherical had me convulsing with nausea from the odor of burning flesh. I used to be advised just some individuals might odor that in remedy. After the primary 4 days of remedy, I used to be throwing up each different hour.

After 10 rounds, I’d misplaced 30 kilos and felt as if my esophagus was burned off. However I made it by. Now, I might return house and have my first-ever surgical procedure: I’d have a port inserted into my mind that would ship a new vaccine straight into my spinal wire fluid. The vaccine was so new, I’d be the second affected person to get it.

For the subsequent 16 Mondays, I’d present up for my six-to-eight-hour appointment. Though the vaccine took simply 10 minutes to manage, it might solely be blended after I checked into the hospital, so most of my time was spent ready. Because the vaccine trickled down by the port in my mind into my spinal wire, I might hear it. Then got here the ache, which I rated 10 out of 10. It was so extreme I couldn’t transfer for an hour afterward, so extreme that when my mother was driving me house and hit a pace bump, I threw up all evening from the ache.

In January 2024, I reached my objective of NED from the neck down, however scans confirmed I’d developed brain tumors. I switched to a breast most cancers remedy that crossed the blood-brain barrier. I might take this treatment as a tablet at house, nevertheless it triggered me to lose 80% of the imaginative and prescient in my proper eye. I began getting injections into the eyeball to stop it from spreading to the opposite eye, nevertheless it didn’t work.

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I needed to swap to my third line of remedy in two years. I now get this chemotherapy each three weeks. Days three by 5 are onerous, however I get two weeks of feeling effectively on this treatment.

My healthcare suppliers predicted I’d survive 4 months, however I’ve now lived for almost two years with leptomeningeal illness. I’m in uncharted territory. To this point, I’m the one one that has been in a position to end the vaccine.

I found the Leptomeningeal Cancer Foundation, which connects and advocates for individuals with this illness. I’ve met unimaginable individuals by this community, and I’m all the time prepared to share my expertise with the vaccine with individuals who have questions. I encourage individuals to strive it, however I don’t sugarcoat it or make it sound straightforward.

The individuals I’ve met by this useful resource have helped me be taught to stay with my illness. I advocate for myself. I strive each trial, and each new remedy, even when it’s scary. I deal with trying ahead. My household has deliberate a visit to Jackson Gap subsequent March. My daughter, Palmer, has by no means seen snow. I wish to do that first, and all of the firsts, along with her. She has so many to expertise.

I’m a logical individual, and I’m not in denial. I solely get emotional once I discuss Palmer. She’s the rationale I’m preventing. She is gentle and pleasure, and she or he’ll be the rationale I do know my household can be okay. She is going to deliver everybody by this.

After my analysis, I wrote 21 birthday letters for Palmer. I needed her to learn them on her birthdays after I used to be gone, to make sure she knew her mother’s love remained along with her as she grew up. I’ve now lived lengthy sufficient to throw away the primary 5 letters as a result of I can inform her I like her in individual. I’m decided now to throw out the sixth.

This instructional useful resource was created with assist from Merck and Daiichi.

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